Time and tide wait for no man, as the saying goes. There were several opportunities came since June last year but I had to politely decline it. There were few reasons that held be back at that point of time. I told to myself that if I ever decided to leave, it would be after I completed some major work or after the submission of the Annual Report.

I started to seriously looking for a new job since January this year. A friend of mine kept pushing for me to send my CV to a few of her contacts, but I told this good friend of mine that I have to wait for the right time. Of course I was worried then with no news coming in, but I maintained my composure. I flunked in one interview end of last year. I didn’t know how to negotiate on my asking pay, which I regret after leaving the interview room. I have not gone for any interviews for almost five years and the skills were a bit rusty. So what I did was, discussing with few friends on negotiating on the packages. Read up few books on manners and a series of philosophising and debating with my mind on how to answer questions.

How God works in mysterious ways, every good things were put together perfectly in a right time. Few head hunters started to call me of which I find the offers were not so attractive, I didn’t make it either. One out of about four companies that I wrote in called, of which I really liked it. It is one of the three major regulators in my industry. I went for the interview and was selected to move on to the next level i.e. sitting for their online assessment. In between the interview and the online assessment, there was another head hunter called for one IB of which I am very much familiar with. I told them that they better be quick as I have been shortlisted for the next stage with the regulator.

So I went to the interview with the IB and they called for a second interview. Just before going for the second interview, I received a call from the regulator that I have been selected for the post that I applied. But they have one little problem with my asking pay of which they are negotiating for a lower pay. This is where my negotiating skills were put into practice. I told them that I am going for a second interview with an IB and what I am asking from the IB is higher than what I am asking from them. I was a bit open at that point of time and willing to explore on the whole package that they are going to give. They gave me about one week to respond on this.

The second interview with the IB too went well and it was done in a rather informal way as I knew them well. I had earlier giving a range of asking pay of which the threshold was higher than the one I was asking from the regulator. And this time, I mellowed down on my negotiation as I had to be realistic. Two days later, I received the letter of appointment of which they are giving the lowest threshold of the range that I asked for. I am okay with that as combining with the whole package. It was a good deal.

When Ayam called me last year informing about him hitting the target that both of us had promised to each other on reaching the targeted pay before we reach 30, I was really worried as I was behind schedule. Considering that Ayam is one year younger, he reached the target much earlier than me. And now, Alhamdulillah, I am back on track with few compensations.

by Coldplay

Just because I’m losing
Doesn’t mean I’m lost
Doesn’t mean I’ll stop
Doesn’t mean I’m across

Just because I’m hurting
Doesn’t mean I’m hurt
Doesn’t mean I didn’t get what I deserved
No better and no worse

I just got lost!
Every river that I tried to cross
Every door I ever tried was locked
Oh and I’m just waiting til the shine wears off

You might be a big fish
In a little pond
Doesn’t mean you’ve won
‘Cause along may come
A bigger one

And you’ll be lost!
Every river that you tried to cross
Every gun you ever held went off
Oh and I’m just waiting til the firing’s stopped
Oh and I’m just waiting til the shine wears off

Oh and I’m just waiting til the shine wears off
Oh and I’m just waiting til the shine wears off

Perjalanan Hidup

Ramli Sarip

Aku yang masih di perjalanan hidup ini
Begitu lama berlegar di persimpangan dunia
Menempuh jarak dan titian
Rimba dan lautan
Mencari sesuatu yang abadi

Aku yang masih di perhentian hidup ini
Begitu jauh mengembara ke serata dunia
Mengejar siang dan malam
Surut dan pasang
Mencari sesuatu kebebasan
Mencari sesuatu kedamaian

Di mana berakhirnya
Perjalananku ini
Esok dan lusa bukan miliku
Oh Tuhanku
Lindungilah hambamu yang hina ini
Aku setia hanya padamu
Oh Tuhanku

Dr Wan Zawawi Ibrahim
Dunia Muzik WEA Sdn Bhd
1987 WEA Records Sdn Bhd

Langston Hughes

What happens to a dream deferred?
Does it dry up
Like a raisin in the sun?
Or fester like a sore–
And then run?
Does it stink like rotten meat?
Or crust and sugar over–
like a syrupy sweet?
Maybe it just sags
like a heavy load.
Or does it explode?

Langston Hughes

Hold fast to dreams
For if dreams die
Life is a broken-winged bird
That cannot fly.
Hold fast to dreams
For when dreams go
Life is a barren field
Frozen with snow.

For some reason, I prefer Adidas and New Balance over other brands. I was actually looking for Adidas Supernova to replace my old one but it was rather too expensive for me today. Well, when I bought my first Supernova few years back, I bought it without a discounted price and mind you Supernova is quite pricey. Nevertheless for heavy people like me whose weight is more than 80kg, Supernova really helps in supporting my weight and uppermost my ailing  joints.

Perhaps after several brainwashing session with Bandit who constantly instill the ringgit sense in me, I caved in and went and look for a trainer with a good bargaining price.

I ended up buying Adizero Tempo as that was a good performing trainer that I can get at a very reasonable price. Comparatively, this Adizero Tempo is lighter than my Supernova but in terms of performance I can’t give a good review as I have not worn it for running. Certainly not a good reviewer I am. I am looking forward to run this evening and hoping that it is not going to rain.

Last weekend too, I bought a Speedo swimming trunk to join Bandit, Shazly, Shukran and few other friends to swim.

So I am gearing up for more sporting activities ahead. I just can’t wait to get back into my sporting life and strike a balance in this life.

Bogged with three major commitments that comes concurrently about 2 ½ years ago, I left the life that I used to have and embraced a new life with mixed feeling, euphoric and also jittery. Those two years also left me with writer’s block phenomenon of which I don’t feel happy for there are so many things happened that I wanted to write about.

Full of ideas lingers in my head but my mind was and perhaps still is occupied with unwelcomed challenges which certainly locked the writing creativity. The agony increased and it is raging from inside tearing every possible nerves, crippled my ability to move in an abstract manner.

I am now trying to regain the control over my life.

It begins with a noble thought, and with that consciousness, you start to translate it to the way you act and react to the circumstances that has been put upon you. Sometime you stumble but sometime you may be able to overcome it with ease.

It is tough. You may leave your bad habit, but your bad habit never leaves you. But it is worth it when you realise that you have made progress. Only we, who knows how much progress that we have made.